It’s interesting to think about the conception of myself as a woman, especially considering I’ve been reared under two opposing cultures. When my parents moved to the United States from the Dominican Republic, they retained the cultural views of their old country. I was taught that a woman was to be only strong enough to run a household and maintain an ignorance of worldly things. A woman was to keep up enough physical appeal to attract a good man, but not to go overboard, and she was to adopt enough intelligence from schools to evolve into a reliable “partner”. A woman’s sexuality was a gift to be given away and once it was lost you lost your “power”. Also, a woman was to help build a household first and career was to be done later, if it was possible. Any deviance from these views is viewed as unwomanly and trashy. My mother was an effective role model.
However, I soon learned that this clashed with my new US culture. I gained an interest in the prospect that the individual, regardless of gender, was responsible for their own success. It is one’s duty as a woman to acquire the intelligence and resources to excel on her own because she is the only one who has her best interest in mind. I began to admire the intelligence of my teachers and the media that empowered women to be equal to men. In this culture, female roles are viewed differently: the females is not limited to anything, female sexuality belongs to the woman and she can share it responsibly, marriage is not the ultimate goal anymore. I would say my aunts, who attained their degrees before building a family, became my role models. I also admired characters in books that held successful jobs (I know it sounds geeky), female professors/teachers, female figures in politics and media… It also helped that I chose a field of study that requires a lot of reflection and questioning of one’s self.
Basically, I’ve struggled significantly with shaping my own idea on the woman I want to become, based on both cultures, and I think I did a great job. :P It was both a blessing and a curse that I had to appease two different cultures because it made me the woman that I am today.
